Is there an age limit on answering questions? No. Leave authoritarian vibes behind in 2021.
"Because I said so", said the mother hen. Naughty authority follows. So, the daughter tries her luck and explains herself less. Believing she too does not need to explain herself. So, the daughter walks around with an air of haughty arrogance. How many mama hens are there? Nobody is above the law. Nobody is above explaining.
Why we can’t just say I told you so.
Frankly, I never really thought or cared about the sentence, “Because I said so”.
Well, I am not a parent and not planning on having kids soon.
Hence, the famous statement that shuts children’s curiosity up never entered my realm of priorities.
Until, I interned, in a place with people who think differently. Others will call these students, “special needs”.
But I believe we all need to think like them, sometimes.
Why is my body on fire 🔥 ?
A young man, who changed my perception of everything would poke and ask me this question every 3 minutes.
I am not even exaggerating (for once).
Continuously, asking why.
- Why his body was on fire.
- Why tiles are box-shaped.
- Also, why is there a sky?
With this person, there always seems to be a why.
Why, why, why.
But the question that influenced me emotionally is, “Why am I in pain”?
When it comes to young beings I tend to have high patience levels I cannot seem to spare for adults.
Usually, every day I would sit and answer his questions. One by one. Reassuring him.
However, on days where I was more annoyed and agitated; I replied, “Just because”.
That is the closest I ever got to telling someone “Because I said so”.
I now see why asking too many questions is annoying
While I learned many lessons through this tall and inquisitive being. Admittedly, my patience was also severely tested.
Something about a person continuously poking you is a bit annoying.
Further, giving me a glimpse into what my parents probably experienced with younger me.
In many ways, the way he was curious about everything reminded me of myself. Only he is the amplified version.
Still, it gave me a better understanding of why people sometimes choose not to explain.
However, the one time I did not respond at all, I saw a flicker in his eyes turn off.
He did not shudder. However, I felt like I slapped him.
No words can do justice to the guilt I felt at that moment.
I let him down like everybody else. To elaborate, everyone around him simply stopped answering.
Honestly, I do not judge or blame them. Since the questions are non-stop and ongoing.
I was there for a shorter period.
Correspondingly, I had more time to catch my patience and thoughts.
No justification can change how small, spiritually speaking, I felt in front of him.
Maybe, it was the fact that even when screamed at his face did not look so disappointed.
Curiosity means you care. How cool is that?
Furthermore, the curiosity inside his wonderful mind rivals people in university.
In many ways, I see his curiosity as a sign of intelligence and zest for life.
Caring so much about every little thing around him. More people should care like him.
In some ways, yes, I am even jealous. The way everything needs to be solved.
Everything is a mystery to him. Even himself.
Perhaps, by answering all the other questions, taking more time to fill and give details of all the possibilities; we can help avoid him asking the pain striking question:
Different versions of “Because I said so”. Deleting, these cop-out answers, from my dictionary.
- Because the computer said so.
- Because my boss said so.
- Because the teacher said so.
That is the first law some children learn at home. No disobedience.
What if we replaced the word disobedience with curiosity? For the brave young souls, who dare question that, they hear the infamous reply, “Because I said so”.
This translates as “Respect my authority“; “I don’t want to be bothered“.
We just nod and accept it. In an environment where authoritarian people rule.
While we cannot change how people speak; we can work on stopping ourselves from answering that way too. Even if it is more convenient.
Refusing to give reasons, respond, and explain translates as honoring yourself as the absolute authority in a matter.
In some circles, this is considered a logical fallacy.
At home though, nobody can cite you up for using illogical thinking. Since well, you are at home.
You can be wild and say wild things. However, it can hurt others’ confidence.
Try not to say it so you don’t knock a loved one down a peg or two.
Answer: even if you don’t know the answer.
Finally, people always say, “Ask questions. Be inquisitive”.
However, less focus is given to how we respond to inquisitive answers.
There is something very special about being asked so many questions you have no idea the answer to.
Why is the sky blue?
I am not a meteorologist or even remotely good at science, especially the science of the clouds.
Yet, a young man with questions dared me to answer.
Hence, I started answering by saying, “I don’t know. But I can guess“.
These conversations continued on and on.
This experience challenged my brain to think, and taught me more than any book, lecture, or person.
There is an honor in being listened to so clearly. Perhaps, my most genuine conversation in life was with someone way younger than me.
There is something magical about being seen and listened to only for your words.
As corny as it sounds, I was supposed to be helping him, but he helped me see everything differently.
Does the sentence, “Because I said so”, piss you off?